(kē-ˌbord krü-zər) A modern mutation of the Cruisey Suzy, the Keyboard Kruiser (KK) is a person who does the majority of their flirtations online through social networking and/or sex websites. Every once in a while a KK will leave their screen-lit den in a misguided attempt to prove to their online compatriots that they do in fact meet people in RL (Real Life). However, such ventures rarely bear fruit because learning to socialize with people whose faces they've never seen without the none-too-subtle help of Photoshop tends to leave them awkward.
An inability to make eye contact coupled with a tendency to blurt out "lol", "wtf", and "pwned," make KKs easy to spot even in the noisiest and most crowded bars. Many KKs are so used to interacting in a relatively consequence-free environment that they tend to over-share disturbing personal information without warning or provocation. This, combined with a tendency to be blithely unaware of human interaction outside of the text-message, makes many KKs obnoxious if mostly harmless bar guests.
Common variations: 400 Lb "Jock", 4Same, Wikiphile and Wrinkled Youth.
Behavior: Many KKs will be either overbearingly opinionated about any conversation within earshot or will find the nearest dark corner to huddle in while wishing that the bar had WiFi. Expect poor social skills and many, many awkward silences.
Quote: "zomgroflamaowtfbbq!!!!1"
Since most bars do not accept PayPal, getting a KK to wrap their head around the idea of Tipping can be a challenge.
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